About leaving

I woke up this morning, by the alarm of my handphone...
I stared sleepily at the screen, trying to click 'Snooze' so I could catch a few more minutes of sweet slumber..
But the date on the screen of my phone jolted my memory- a reality that I'll be leaving in 10 days.
I eat my breakfast at the dining table.
And the date printed on the morning papers again reminds me of my impending departure..
I'm so constantly reminded of what day of the month it is everyday by various things and it kinda scares me how soon I'll be leaving Singapore to a far far away land... Its realy a mix of excitement and a bit of apprehension. I told Marco I'm not ready to leave Singapore. And he told me I'll never be.. Guess he's right..

A recent death of a close relative in the family probably explains why I'm feeling all gloomy these days.
My uncle's death was so sudden, mysterious even.
He just left home one afternoon and never came back. 2 days later, he was found drowned in a canal.
I helped out at the wake every day after work. My auntie cried and cried and its the first time I truly understood how someone could cry her voice hoarse... She hugged everyone, with tears streaming down her face. All she said was " He was a good man, a loving husband, a wonderful father.".
Sigh... how heartbreaking.

Maybe its the whole mood of the wake made me truly worry about not making it back from Canada...
I told my mum lets hang out on monday- it be the last time we go shopping together if I don't get back.
"CHOY" my mum said, and started nagging at me for saying stuff like that.

"Let's not quarrel from now till I'm back", I told Marco, " I don't want the last memories of us to be littered with petty quarrels, in case I don't make it back..

Gosh, this are some seriously gloomy thoughts... . Okay lah, I'm sure I'm just being silly and I'll be OKAY! I should psycho myself to start thinking positive thoughts, like how Canada and her cold winter winds are beckoning me :P

Oh, I saw my primary 6 form teacher, Mrs Lim, at the wake!
She was a good friend of my uncle's daughter and I haven't seen her in years and years and years!
For all who doesn't know, I really enjoyed my days in my neighbourhood primary school and the Primary 5/6 days were particularly memorable because of Mrs Lim. It was on hindsight that I realised how inspirational and how pivotal she was in shaping me to what I am today. And it was also her that made me want to be a teacher since I was young, because I realised how good teachers really made adifference in the lives of children and their future, like how Mrs Lim changed my life.. Her lessons were never boring- she played games during classes, told us nice stories and also brought our class to win every single singing competition / storytelling competition/ sports event organised by the school.

She first introduced me to Vincent Van Gogh in primary 6 and my interest in art started ever since. I remember her playing "Starry Starry Night" in class, twice, and the assignment was to draw anything we wanted after hearing that song.. In fact, it was also her encouragement that gave me the courage to pursue art in secondary school all the way till JC. It was an emotional farewell as wthe class left school after PSLE. We cried, she cried, and not long after she left to teach in HK..

My mum went up to Mrs Lim at the wake today. Mum had tears in her eyes as she held Mrs Lim's hands, and thanked her for moulding me into what I am today. Mrs Lim was hugging her and telling her that she has a wonderful daughter. Super eotional! But my mum always wanted to thanks Mrs Lim and like almost a decade later, she finally had the chance!

I saw my Primary 6 Chinese teacher too! memories of endless chinese comprehensions and spelling tests came to mind! Attending wakes are like attending mini-reunions huh? (though i really don't wish for more wakes). Anyways, I'm still in awe at at impeccable mastery of the Chinese language!

Heh! and more good news! As I am drafting this entry, ITS MY LAST DAY OF WORK!!! *jumps, screams, hops and flips*.. Finally finally finally, i have time to pack my lugguage, sleep late and wake up even later! :)
going off for a mini-celebration tonight!
Eating at the Shokudo (is this even spelt right?) restaurant at the basement of Raffles City, then heading for some super duper nice crepes! Caaaaaaaannnnnnnnn't WAIT!